Sunday, March 28, 2010

"I Will Rise..."

The choir at Memorial Baptist Church preformed a cantata this morning for Palm Sunday (not a cantina for Psalm Sunday...*giggle*).  Originally I was part of the performance, but a few weeks into the practices I dropped out (after this mornings performance I completely regret my decision).

During the cantata the congregation participated in the Lord's super (communion) and there was a performance of the crucifixion that the songs were arranged around.


The scene where Jesus is nailed to the Cross, blood stained across his forehead from the crown of thorns, beaten and weary...

I couldn't help but allow my tears to fall.

Sitting among the people that brought me to my salvation and watching the reenactment of Jesus suffering on the Cross I was reminded of God's love for me, that I am totally broken, but perfectly and completely loved!  There isn't anything in me that can make me any more acceptable in God's eyes. 

I was reminded that it is about living a life of surrender and not of behavior modification...I still struggle to let Jesus keep the reigns it took me so long to give over, and I am daily confronted with my own sinfulness and shortcomings, but I have a deep hope that keeps me going!  I feel more and more challenged everyday to live in the tension of my utter sinfulness and God's amazing love for me, I am touched by brokenness in the world and in myself.  I am reminded that God will never leave me, and this mornings scene emphasized His goodness, His power and His presence! 

Over the last year I have experienced incredible healing and learned what it means to live in true community.  I am discovering how to absolutely live in the freedom of the Gospel...on one hand it is very exciting and victorious as Jesus teaches me...on the other hand, being undistracted and vulnerable enough to the Spirit to actually conquer the wickedness in my life is difficult business, but it keeps me humble.  God has re-awakened me to His grace and His mercy!

What an amazing musical arrangement to witness this morning!!  A HUGE thank you to the choir, the actors and the director...thank you for reminding me God's beautiful gift!

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