Monday, March 8, 2010
Burn After Reading...
I've started working out with a personal trainer again...
Andre. Big. African-American. Fierce. Does not handle whining well. Immune to batting eyelashes and bribes.
This morning was my first workout with Andre. Andre wants me to keep a journal. I will record my eating habits and my feelings every day.
This should provide a wealth of entertainment for all of you...
The following is my entry for today:
Day 1. March 8, 2010
5:30 - 6:30 workout. After twenty minutes of cardio I lifted weights for the first time in....Lord only knows how long it's been. Andre said I would start with some "light" weight lifting. Light my fanny...sixty pounds on the squat machine feels like I'm giving birth to all three of my boys at the same time, all over again. I actually cried as I walked up the stairs to my office this morning and it took me a good ten minutes to sit in my chair.
Breakfast: Chai Latte from Coffee Zone (um, the owner is a friend of mine and he makes me smile...so I'm sure the calorie count does not effect me), nutri grain cereal bar (mixed fruit)
Mid-morning snack: Craisins (cranberries/raisins...this was a first for me...I promptly gagged at the first try. Craisins will definitely not be on my diet).
Lunch: Garden salad at home. I had no salad dressing in the refrigerator. I ate the cucumber slices and the shredded cheese from the salad. I made a note to myself to pick up salad dressing, then I opened a box of Wheat Thins and ate half the box.
Dinner: Shrimp Creole that hottie husband made. Delicious. Hottie husband left to take the boys to Boy Scouts and as I was cleaning up the dishes from dinner I spotted a Tupperware container of "can't leave alone" bars that hottie husband made yesterday. I have discovered why they are called "can't leave alone" bars...I ate four.
Bottled Water: 0
Diet Dr. Pepper: 4
Mood: Cranky, irritable, tired and hungry
By the way, Andre and I started off on the wrong foot this morning...here is an actual conversation between the two of us (by boss will get a kick out of this):
Andre: "Did you bathe in your perfume? Seriously."
Me: "What? What's the matter?"
Andre: "I'm getting a headache from the toxic amount of perfume you are wearing. Good Lord Betsy!"
Me: "Seriously? What do you want? Do you want me to sweat like a pig and smell like a barn?"
Andre: "It might be better."
Me: "Don't forget that I pay you for this."
Andre: "Seriously, I should call you in for fragrance abuse."
Me: "Shut up and count...I'm not doing one more sit up than I have to!"