Hmmmm....what story from my life should I pull from the shelf and tell today?
"Snow White Teeth"
For privacy purposes (and to not make those involved feel any more guilty than I am sure they already feel) I will not use real names in this story...
When I was 20 years old I came back from my freshman year at William Woods (that's another story for another time) and I worked for a car dealership here in Jefferson City as the receptionist (okay, for advertising purposes I'll tell you that it was Riley Cadillac). I LOVED my job at the dealership! I met my very best friend of almost 16 years at Riley's, Amy. I loved working for Kevin Riley (hottie!) and his brothers. I had so much fun and made so many friends at Riley Cadillac!
When I was nine years old I fell on the playground at school and chipped my front tooth in half. Dr. Ambrose (my dentist of choice) put a cap on the tooth. The problem with the cap was that it became a little "discolored" next to my real pearly whites and I had to have it "painted" to match the rest. I was very self conscience of this...
(Back to job at Riley Cadillac)
One day, someone I worked with at Riley's (I'm not naming any names, but the dealership has his last name and I think he's a hottie) asked me,
He who's name shall not be spoken: "Just out of curiosity, why is your front tooth not as white as your other teeth?"
Me (extremely self conscience): "Because it's a cap and I need to have it painted and I haven't had time to go to the dentist."
He who's name shall not be spoken: "You should try gargling bleach, that would do the trick!"
Oh, I should mention here that I am probably the MOST gullible person you will ever meet. I take things literally...literally.
So....(can you see where this is going?) I went home after work that evening and guess what I did? Yep....I actually put CLOROX BLEACH in my mouth and swished it around and then gargled it.....
Wanna know the moral of this story?
DO NOT....I REPEAT....DO NOT GARGLE BLEACH (of any kind, not just Clorox). You WILL end up in the emergency room at the local hospital because you WILL burn your esophagus and then you will have to call into work the next day and explain to the owner of the company that you took his advice and gargled bleach and now you will have to whisper for the next two weeks.
*As a side note I should say that I have forgiven "he whose name shall not be spoken." And, I expect MAJOR discounting on any car I buy for the rest of my life! ;)