Thirty...Sixteen Again...

30 day challenge, Question #4: "List 10 things you would tell your 16 year-old self, if you could"

I'd like to begin by saying that I wish I could be 16 years old again! Oh the days of no worries...

*As a side note, four days before my 16th birthday my youngest sister was born. Brendan (who just celebrated her 22nd birthday!) was born with a heart defect, a collapsed lung, both legs were broken and she was life flighted to the University of Missouri Hospital. Certainly this was not how anyone expected her birth to play out...

...I'll save the rest of that story for another post.

So, I'm my thirty-something self and I have an opportunity to tell my sixteen year old self 10 things...

I would say: (dear mother, I apologize ahead of time...some of these may shock you, disappoint you, disgust you...but I have to be honest...)

1. Hangovers are so overrated. Ugh....I'm ashamed to say that my first experience with alcohol (and a hangover) was at the tender age of 16. I stayed overnight at a party with my best friend (of course both our parents were told that we were staying the night at another friend's house....our parents knew nothing about a party) and Purple Passion was the drink of the night! A bottomless cup of Purple Passion sent me into a drunken stupor and the next day I paid for it....

2. Drop the bag of Cheetos....that hot 'Victoria Secret' body of yours will be replaced with the body of Rosanne Barr. Start eating healthy now! Do NOT brag about how you can "eat whatever I want and I don't gain weight..." .....it's there honey, trust me!

3. Be nice to EVERYONE...especially the nerds. Believe me when I say it WILL come back to bite you in the butt. Besides, you'll end up marrying one!  ;)

4. DO NOT....I REPEAT, DO NOT listen to your "friends" that will dare you to run out on the football field during the homecoming football game in your skimpy cheerleading uniform WITHOUT underwear or bloomers.....you WILL get caught by the coach and you WILL be in a world of trouble...and even though it will feel like it was totally worth it, it isn't. And yes...it too will come back to bite you in the butt later in life.

5. Driving isn't nearly as exciting as you think it is....it gets really old... And when you become a mother you take on the role of taxi driver....it stinks.

6. Ask your parents to show you how to put gas in your car. Trust me, it will be really embarrassing at the age of twenty-one to ask your boss to show you how to fill up your tank.

7. Seriously....stop obsessing about boys. Who cares who your date to prom will be...it certainly will not matter when you are paying the bills at the age of twenty-one because you are living on your own after flunking out of college and your parents have "given up" on you. Focus on school...use your full potential.

8. You are not going to marry your high school sweetheart...yes, you may think you are "in love" but you really don't know what "love" is right now. Your self-reasoning of "I'm going to marry him, so it's okay to have sex with him..." ....it will create a plethora of problems for you. Get your hormones in check and wait until you are married!

9. When your parents give you the opportunity to gain trust with them and they leave you for the weekend at home with the keys to the suburban but tell you that you may "only use the car for an emergency".....your parents definition of an "emergency" is NOT to gather six of your closest friends and tepee the house of the girl that dared to flirt with your boyfriend. You WILL get caught...not only by your parents, but by the police...oh yeah, and DO NOT try to outrun the cops...the law ALWAYS wins.

10. Do not run home after school to get the mail before your mother gets home. Even though you beat your parents to the mailbox and were able to pull out your mid-term grade card that had several "C's" and "D's", you will still get caught...it will not take your parents long to figure out that you burned the grade card after they see the giant burn mark in the carpet of your bedroom.