Dear Christmas, The Good, The Bad & The Ugly...

Every year I attempt to write the "perfect" Christmas letter...you know the one...bragging on my three "precious", "angelic" and "oh so intelligent" little boys, my "strong", "hard-working", and "sensitive" hottie husband and the job that I "absolutely love."  Christmas is a time for joy...the spreading of good cheer, so naturally we write Christmas letters to our family and friends of only the pleasantries from the past year.

Last night I sat with my laptop, cursor blinking on a blank Microsoft Word template, awaiting my first tap tap taps of my "jolly" news from 2009. 

"Dear loved ones,

I hope this letter finds you rested and content during this busy time of the year.  2009 has certainly been...."

And then I paused, searching for the perfect word to describe what 2009 brought for the Dudenhoeffer family.  The year flashed before me, and a thought crossed my mind...what if my letter wasn't all rainbows and bunnies?  What would my letter look like if I was honest about it all and I didn't leave the "bad" out?

"Dear loved ones,

We are flat broke.  We embarked on a basement/master bedroom remodel that is now going on year two.  All of our savings is going into this major headache of a project and we had to use the Christmas money that we get from my father to purchase gifts for the kids...from "Santa."  Hottie husband and I have had four major arguments this year, one in which I stomped out and "hid" at my office for eight hours (but boy, did I get a LOT of work accomplished)!  I've been diagnosed with diabetes on top of my epilepsy and my skin cancer returned for the fifth time, requiring me to receive radiation (golly, that's always fun).  Jackson still struggles with his reading, Benjamin quite frequently gets a spoonful of horseradish for foul language and Hayden...well, he's a teenager (that should sum it up for you).  My job is extremely stressful and the probability of me meeting my goals are slim in this economy.  Hottie husband has traveled more this year between his job and his obligation with the National Guard than he has in the eleven years we have been married, leaving me (sometimes weeks at a time) to be alone with the three boys and all of their extra curricular activities.  My license was taken away for six months due to the epilepsy, and so I was dependent on anyone for small things such as going to the grocery store for a gallon of milk.  Hottie husband had to have a root canal, which set us back a house payment and the family doctor had to write him an excuse to give to his commander stating that a bad knee would keep him from completely participating in the National Guard PT test.  My father is suffering from MS, my mother suffers from...craziness (but we love her so much) and my siblings...well, that's another letter.  Some days I feel like I'm going to explode, other days are great...that's the beauty of mood swings..."

I sat back in my chair to evaluate what I had just typed.  I smiled...this is why Christmas letters are limited to only the "good", my goodness, I want to jump off a bridge after reading all this...

I continued my letter...

"and yet, despite all of the struggles, God is so good to us.  In February I accepted Christ as my Lord and Savior.  In April we became members of a church that we adore!  In May, hottie husband and I were baptized.  The boys have made new friends through youth groups and Sunday school.  Hottie husband and I have been blessed through the church with new friends that have the same morals and life goals as we do.  Just last week our oldest son Hayden was baptized, having accepted Jesus has his Lord and Savior.  We have a roof over our heads, food on our table and we both have jobs that we are passionate about!  And so...2009 has been life changing for us.  We are coming to know Christ in a more intimate way and we are amazed at what we were missing out on before! 

And so I write to you, wishing you a very Merry Christmas...may the Lord bless you as he has blessed our family...with Faith, knowing that He is God.  With Commitment...to build on our relationship with Jesus, and with Light...the light of God to chase away the darkness."

There it was...my "perfect" Christmas letter.  The good, the bad & the ugly...because it doesn't seem as "bad" or as "ugly" when you can say that Jesus is beside you!

Merry Christmas,
The Dudenhoeffer's